Day 6 April Napowrimo Ekphrastic Poetry 2 The Da Vinci Goad

When I saw her, first, she was wearing a wine-dark bathrobe
and smoking a black cheroot in a long brown holder.
Drop it, Mona Lisa, I admonished her
and she did,

but the wrong thing!

Her whatsits popped out
and my eyes.
Now that was
something!
What tits she had
woulda blinded
me
if they had poked me
in my eye.

It was destiny, it was chance,
it was fate,
it was I Ching.

I started to paint
furiously
yet stopped frequently
to light her cheroot
but accidentally
trying to hide my bulge
I set her eyebrows
alight

All she did
was smile enigmatically
to hide her grimace of pain
& at my buffoonery
while I shaved them off
and set off on
the task of painting
again

The result
they say
is a masterpiece

But when she looked at it
she burst out laughing
and said
what the hell
is this mockery
all this vague scenery
behind me
my damn, missing eyebrows
and my covered-up whatsits?